Friday, October 23, 2009

Sh*t It's Nearly Been A Week...

...since last post. Been a bit busy if I'm honest (blame Mr. Luckhurst and his team for throwing work at us left, right and centre) and just found a few spare moments to update you with stuff.

There seems to be a new act of public indecency on the rise, one which I've noticed a lot more at Uni. It courses horrific pain to the victim, and extreme pleasure for the criminal.
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I am of course talking about, the horror that is, the Facebook Rape.
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So far, homosexual activity on my account has risen tenfold. I have had 3 different male relationships in a week (probably how Steven Gaitley's ex is 'grieving'), told many different, newly acquired, female friends that 'I am horny for them' and how 'I jizzed myself' over one of their pictures, and changed my political stance from Conservative to 'Nazi'. Ha ha f*cking ha.

I actually enjoy this activity (not being a Nazi, don't worry), as it has given us 'chief rapers' (sounds like some kind of Red Indian sex offender) a sense of competition. Who can rape who the hardest...? I'll be honest, I've got some pretty sick ideas running around my head, all I need is access to their Facebook account...

In other news, despite having a 2,500 History of Journalism essay to start, I've found a few hours to be bored enough to Google my lecturers. Turns out they're a pretty talented bunch. But that still doesn't make them b*stards for swamping me with all this reading and work. Damn you BAFTA-winning, Scotsman editing, Guardian leader-ing lecturers...Over and out xD

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